#34 – finally revealed

i was hoping real hard to get through this well from the start. i thought i have done my best, put my very best effort. in the end, it turn up this way. i didn’t ask for this, no one does. sometimes i think this is like a curse put on me. like, why must it happen? some people are so lucky that they manage to escape it. me, on the other hand, is not blessed with that lucky-ness. i am tired of trying. the fact that i have to try harder than other people is killing me.

now i’m 100% sure that what am i doing now is not my cup of tea. what is more important is to reach the finishing line.

there’s still a last resort to this. few friends thought of trying. i’ve already think about it and decided to try. who knows miracle would happen and could erase my grief. ya Allah, please bless me in everything that i do. give me the strength to cope with what is going on.

i want to walk in the rain, so that no one would notice that i’m crying. no one..


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